Valentine’s Day Makes You Fat

14 Feb

I don’t mean to be unromantic.  But there’s few ways to slice it.  Either you’re swilling your way through champagne and chewing on chocolates till the night swells to its intended progression, or your spoon is hitting the bottom of an ice cream pint you’re emptying over Law and Order reruns.  Little else in between is devoid of naughty nibbles and waist-line widening wares.  I mean, it is Valentine’s Day after all, so even those of us snug in a marriage with regular old family dinner planned would be feeling just a little cheated if we didn’t indulge in the office treats the stick-thin temptress admin brings  in or a chocolate-laced dessert picked up at the corner store after the baby’s in bed.  On either end of the spectrum and at all points between, Valentine’s day is as lethal to a diet as Ramadan is helpful.  Maybe Lent should be revised so that it requires a person to do something, as opposed to restraining them.  Then, instead of giving up Facebook, like some of my friends are doing, we would be waking up at 5 a.m. to go jogging.  Oh, wait, we can do that with or without Lent.  Fear of God helps, though – stronger than cupid’s arrow.  Whatever your poison or passion this Valentine’s day, here’s hoping you indulge in the best of it.  For tomorrow we … jog?

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